Twas the night before Christmas

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blackhatch
Deck Plate Wanderer
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Twas the night before Christmas

Post by blackhatch »

'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the ship
Everyone was in bed. No booze to sip
When from the engine room there came a big clatter
The Chief ran in and said "what the fuck is the matter

The engineer pointed up and said, it came from the stack
Bent over and farted, and through out his back
The crew was assembled and all stood in awe
When they opened the boiler Santa fell on the floor

The old man was lifted and his clothes dusted down
He gazed at all the crew and was wearing a frown
With a curse and a grumble he leapt back in the stack
And took of on his reindeer, without looking back

The office was called but no one would chat
Except for Peter who said "I'm not paying for that"
The boiler was broken, and no parts in sight
The Chief just said " fuck it, Merry Christmas, and to all a good night"
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Merlyn
Fleet Engineer
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Currently located: South Coast UK
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Re: Twas the night before Christmas

Post by Merlyn »

Apon the Chiefs cabin door did bang the Er rating,
Quick down below he cried, its all apon the plating.
The chief ran down to down below and sure enough did spy,
The conrod and crosshead he did see through his right eye.
A detailed close up of the rod
Did depict a blackened dirty twisted sod
And to the hole up in the block he at once did state,
It's all a mess but as for now make up a blanking plate
As to the block his practiced eye did see the answer to the holes
It's yet another job for Belzona and his trusty souls.
The two pack sealer he did mix and stick into the hole,
A plate was made to seal the damage, a seal up role.
A drill and here he did decry, we have to tap,
And clear the swarf and all that crap.
No blind hole bottoming is required in the crankcase casting
For the job it must be everlasting.
Up to the hole the plate did fit
And all the sealant bit by bit.
Apon a start up he did see
No oileaks misting there would be.
So off to home the ship did bonk
On only five now it did honk.
On Five buckets in line versus six it now did run
But what the hell, at least it was more fun.
Now in conclusion the chief said no matter where we roam,
We 're fed up, fucked up and far from home.
Remembering The Good Old days, when Chiefs stood watches and all Torque settings were F.T.
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JollyJack
Fleet Engineer
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Re: Twas the night before Christmas

Post by JollyJack »

That sounds like a Doxford repair! :)
Discourage incest, ban country "music".
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Merlyn
Fleet Engineer
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Currently located: South Coast UK
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Re: Twas the night before Christmas

Post by Merlyn »

Spot on JJ.
That was exactly the famous happening I refered to!
Ship came back from the other side of the world minus one Cyl.
But what about the day job?
Not give it up just yet?
Remembering The Good Old days, when Chiefs stood watches and all Torque settings were F.T.
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JollyJack
Fleet Engineer
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Re: Twas the night before Christmas

Post by JollyJack »

Another 6 months. :)
Discourage incest, ban country "music".
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